Weird Wednesday...

Sparks Of Insanity By Vinny "Bond" Marini Wednesday, March 04, 2009

This whole contract negotiation with Kurt Warner has turned into the football equivalent of Manny Ramirez. Dude...sure you have some great stats, but out of your 10 seasons you have only played in more then 11 games half the time. OK, you got to the Super Bowl three times, but you only have ONE ring...


I realize that statistically, you are the second-most accurate quarterback in NFL history (trailing only Chad Pennington), with a career completion percentage of 65.7%...wait ....CHAD PENNINGTON???? Oh right, when you throw 5-yard passes, you tend to be accurate!

Do you really think you will have a better chance in San Francisco? You better like clouds because you will be on your back more than anything. Arizona has offered $20-Million for two years...$20-Million!!!!! He wants $28-Million...I just wonder what Kurt made as a stock boy? Ah...$5.50/hr.

I ask as I have asked many times...do these people know there is a scary recession going on? Do they realize that many of their fans will not be able to think about tickets for the upcoming season?

Really...how much more is $4-Million/year when you think about it on the larger scale?



So, in an effort to refinance his life Michael Jackson is planning some comeback concerts in London. The singer who was nicknamed "big nose" as a child by his father (seriously, he was!) is now known as "no nose" by the uncaring public. And what has he done to deserve this injustice?

He has never 'cut his nose to spite his face' and he has always loved little children...

ummm what?

oh yeah, maybe that is why the public does not care any longer.

His last public appearance was at the 2006 World Music Awards. He was scheduled to perform "We Are the World" but only managed a few lines before leaving the stage.

Rumors that his nose began to fall off as he reached for a high note, remain to this day, unconfirmed. Though we have found evidence that it might be true...



Many of y'all know that our most excellent friend MATT-MAN of "Bagwine Ruminations" is in the midst of his annual Lenten Fast when he eschews all meats (except fish) and sustains his life on beans and whey...Well...in an attempt to make this easier for him, we post the following picture which is sure to make him pass out for the next 20 days or so...


Yes, Rachael Ray said her mother was very upset when she stripped down for the sexy 2003 FHM photos...I would think her mom would have been more upset that it appears Rachel had hit the bong for about an hour before the picture of her sucking on that wooden spoon like it was a Quarter-pounder with cheese was taken...dang Matt, sorry about the meat reference...

Well, maybe he was napping and did not hear it....




And to celebrate the week long appearance by U2 on The David Letterman Show, we offer up this news item which will make our friend STARRLIGHT from "Here Comes A Storm In The Form OF A Girl" squeal like a teeny-bopper...

U2’s Bono did an interview on radio to promote his new CD No Line On The Horizon. But Bono seemed to have Coldplay’s Chris Martin on his mind and referred to him as a “wanker” and “cretin”.

In the radio interview, Jo Whiley asked Bono if he thought Chris Martin was as talented as Paul McCartney.

“I think he’s that good a melodist, but he’s a wanker,” was Bono’s reply.

Whiley reportedly asked Bono for an apology, but Bono just said, “I’m a reformed character, I don’t any more.”

Then to dig himself deeper, Bono said Chris Martin was “obviously a completely dysfunctional character and a cretin, but he happens to be a great melodist and up there with Ray Davies, Noel Gallagher and Paul McCartney.”

Later in the interview, seemed to rethink his rude comments and stated, “I think [Coldplay] are a great band and, actually, it turns out [Martin's] a great soul as well. Sorry about that. I was just joking entirely.”

Now now Bono...we all know you meant it ... especially since Chris Martin IS a wanker and a cretin


While on 'the rack' at the Chiropractor's on Monday, this came across my iTouch and I just had to share it. From their appearance at The Beacon Theater on March 15, 1997, this is "Blue Sky" from The Allman Brother's Band. It starts out with a bit of "Franklin's Tower", the Grateful Dead song...and then explodes into Blue Sky...

The lineup at that time was:
* Gregg Allman - organ, piano, guitar, vocals
* Dickey Betts - guitar, slide guitar, vocals
* Butch Trucks - drums, tympani
* Jai Johanny "Jaimoe" Johanson - drums, percussion
* Warren Haynes - guitar, slide guitar, vocals
* Allen Woody - bass, background vocals
* Marc QuiƱones - drums, percussion, background vocals

ENJOY...


17 Of Your Sparks

  1. katherine. Says:
  2. Dear Kurt,

    Pay no attention to the southern gentleman with the funny accent.

    Ticket prices for the Niners will be the same no matter what you do...so please please come play with us. The salary cap needs you.

    The clouds are nicer here. Great schools for the kids. JT could use a mentor.

    You'd look really hawt in Red and Gold.

    XO,
    katherine.

     
  3. katherine. Says:
  4. I have a great deal of respect for paul hewson...personally and professionally....

     
  5. Matt-Man Says:
  6. The best thing about Rachel? She never leaves the house without an ample rump roast tagging along behind her. Cheers Vinny!!

     
  7. Twyla Says:
  8. Michael Jackson scared me as a child, and still scares me now...for different reasons. LOL
    I love David Letterman, but never get a chance to watch him. The show doesn't come on until after midnight here, and that's just too late for me on a weeknight. LOL 6:00am comes way too early.

     
  9. I think you are off on Warner. Taking the ARIZONA CARINALS to the Superbowl? You saw that coming? The dude wasn't even suppose to start. He has even offered to sign for less at 'Zona if they bring back Bolin.

    Manny's great. But he is a disruptive distraction on a team and his agent is Scott Boras. I just don't see the linkage. At all.

    Sometimes rock musicians should just play the tunes...

    Just my two cents...

     
  10. Jay Says:
  11. I kind of take a different position on Warner too. The Cards hadn't even won a playoff game in like a billion years and NEVER been to the SB before Warner. And what did the owner do after that? He tried to low-ball Warner and started nickle and dimming his team and the fans again.

    They don't deserve Warner.

    And everybody is worth whatever somebody will pay them.

    Bono didn't say anything about Martin that isn't true.

    Of course Bono is a HUGE dooooshbag himself. haha

     
  12. Bond Says:
  13. KATHERINE: LOL...I am sure he will see your nice letter...FUNNY! You had me scratching my head for a second with the Paul Hewson reference...then again, it was only 6:45am

    MATT-MAN: A meat reference during Lent????

    TWYLA: Comes on at 10:30 here, so it is watchable

    BUD: I just have a problem with him turning down $10Million/year
    Agree on the rock stars thing

    JAY: Again...$10Million Jay...I mean come on now..with people losing their jobs and all
    Be careful what you say about Bono with Starr and Songbird around!

     
  14. Don't think that's Rachel Ray, Vinny! Her head on a sexy body, maybe?

     
  15. Tug Says:
  16. And everybody is worth whatever somebody will pay them.

    I agree. And I've loved Kurt since his Rams days...

    Now Michael Jackson? ewwwwwwww. and I like U2's music, but never really been a Bono fan. No reason, just haven't.

     
  17. ...I was able to listen to the entire tune...beautiful segue...The Dead and the Brothers always were in cahoots...Rachel Ray? fron Hugeass, NY?...(Matt loves her!)...Ha!...

     
  18. Bond Says:
  19. MARY: No that is her...just a few yeas and pounds ago

    TUG: Well he got $3Million more, so good for him

    PHFRANKIE: The Brothers do the Dead very well...Yup from Hugeass, NY

     
  20. Dana Says:
  21. Michael Jackson **shakes head**

     
  22. Starrlight Says:
  23. Hating Bono is tres fashionable. Kinda like hating Green Day is fashionable. Us fans of both of them are used to it.

    And yeah I have heard the entire interview. Mr. Hewson is joking. I WISH he really thought that, but I know for a fact that Bono and The Twat are friendly. Heck Bono just shared the stage with Chris AND Brandon Lip Pubes Flowers of The Killers. My two least favorite frontmen, evah.

    Let me tell you, 27 years of Bono love was tested over that one. Oh and Bono even thanks Chris on the liner notes to NLOTH so, yeah. Nice move Ms BBC.

    I just finished part one of my review of the new U2 album =)

     
  24. Travis Says:
  25. It helps to be able to win the West with a 9-7 record, enjoy two of the best wide outs in the game, and have any credible opponent have their worst game against you during your playoff run.

    But other than that, Warner is 37 years old. The 49ers are rebuilding, not looking for a quick fix to get to the playoffs. They need a QB with a future in the game, not a veteran with only a year or two left.

    But Songbird should be pleased because I heard Warner ended up re-signing with Arizona. Sorry Katherine!

     
  26. Mimi Lenox Says:
  27. She's eating chocolate??!

     
  28. Yes, Travis, I'm very pleased to read that Kurt has re-signed with the Cards. It's about time. I knew that Kurt and his family were entrenched here in the Valley; they love it here. They live in a gorgeous neighborhood, their kids attend THE BEST school district in the area, and the views are magnificent. Besides, the fans adore Mr. Warner, so how could the Cards NOT re-sign him?

    The surest way to bring out the she-bitch-tiger in Starr is mention our beloved Mr. Hewson and that Coldplay poseur in the same sentence. *grin*

     
  29. Starrlight Says:
  30. YEAH! And now I got an Ear Necklace to add to my fear factor!!

     

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