When Real Life and Blog Life Become One...

Sparks Of Insanity By Vinny "Bond" Marini Thursday, August 06, 2009

I went over to visit my friend LeeLee of “Thoughts & Meanderings” yesterday. She has been bitten by the FB bug so she does not blog as much as she used to.

Today was a post with the Eric Clapton song “Tears In Heaven” and a note that it was for her friend JL4.

I shot over to visit to see what it was about and from the posts nothing looked different. But in the comment section for the last post was a comment. In part it said this:
This is his daughter. If I knew the password for this blogger account I would be making a formal post and not just a comment. But unfortunately I don't know it and couldn't even begin to guess…I'm sad to report that my dad passed away early in the morning on July 31st.. Quickly, painlessly and easily. For those familiar with his earlier posts I'm sorry to say: the monster won. But never was there a more worthy adversary.

What a sad thing for a child to have to do. And I also thought about the fact that his blog will stay on his last post forever...a very funny posting BTW…This was it in it’s entirety:

California Commissions New Quarter

I did go back to the beginning of his posting time; he began blogging about 2 months before I in January of 2006.

OK, so the guy was a Red Sox fan…can not hold that against him (well, I would have given him some grief if I had known of his blog...in one of his first entries he states; "Oh...and I absolutely have a life-long love affair with the Boston Red Sox. Remember the snobbery part mentioned above? That applies to anyone coming on here going "go Yankees" or anything imbecile like that as well. I don't like the Yankees or Yankee fans. If that upsets you, get over it.")

JL4 was a Republican, who back in 2006 wrote "I'm a republican who is deeply troubled with the actions of the current administration, and no...that doesn't mean I'm becoming a democrat and I now want to hear your babbling baloney either."

The guy was very funny. He had a great sense of humor. I will continue to read through his posts while they exist.

I asked myself why...why am I compelled to read a blog written by a man who admittedly, without meeting me, doesn't like me simply because I am a Yankee fan. A man who on his profile answered the question "You're wearing a sweater that stretches down to your feet. What color belt do you put on?"
With the answer, "I'm not gay, therefore I don't wear sweaters."

It could be because in some strange blcidence (in MIMI of "Mimi Writes" speak that is blog + coincidence), he and I are/were similar in some ways.

JL4 says in one of his first posts, "I use the ... 3-dot thing a lot. Why I don't know. Gramatically(sic), I couldn't tell you the first thing about what it means. I guess for me it's just a way of expressing the way I pause for thought or effect. In most cases it will be for effect, because true thought rarely enters my head." Well, if you have been here more than two days in a row, you know the "... 3-dot thing" lives here on The Couch.

But, I'll tell you what? When or if I figure out why I now feel compelled to read on, I will share it with y'all.

Another thing I keep coming back to his daughter hopeful to put up one last post for her dad and not knowing his password.

A few years ago, I thought about sending my password and instructions on what to do if something ever happened to me to either Matt or my best friend, as I was living alone in Memphis and had just had my first real scare (kidney stones, all alone, having to call the ambulance with no one nearby to reach out to)...but that, even then, seemed too freakin' morbid...

Now, with Nancy, it is easy.

I wonder though…have you thought about that? Do you have a contingency plan in place for your blog? Hell, do you have a will?

Jorma & Jack at the Fox Theater in Boulder, CO on December 13th 2000. "Death Don't Have No Mercy"

22 Of Your Sparks

  1. I have no contingency plans for my blog; I guess I never thought about it. No one in my close, small circle in real life blogs, so I guess I would have to find a blogger I trust. Hmmmm...

    (oh look, I used an ellipsis...)

  2. Matt-Man Says:
  3. Schmoop has all of my info for my blog. As for the ellipsis, I use them frequently to indicate a pause in my speech or to break up a series of examples. I try to write as I would talk so it works out well.

    Ha...A bittsweet post about death and bloggin has turned into English 101...Odd. Cheers Vinny!!

  4. DrillerAA09 Says:
  5. Most people I know have no real idea that I blog or have no interest in blogging...so, when I'm gone, I'm gone, and so is the blog.

  6. leelee Says:
  7. Thank you Vinny for this post. I am still having trouble putting coherant thoughts together about the passing of my friend JL4. But I must say..you totally "got" him. as did I. Many of our views were very different and then again, they were a like in so many ways. He was blunt, opinionated, honest and funny as hell. There were times reading him, that I couldn't stop the tears from laughter and sometimes tears for the poignant. ~sigh~

    He left a wife, and 3 children..26 (the daughter) and two sons 17 and 9. Needless to say, passing at 51 is too young.

    As you read , you will see how he battled to live longer..and his love for this country and his military service.

    Thank you again for posting this..and to all your readers, I do hope you will go read him. He was an original.


  8. Bond Says:
  9. SONGBIRD: I wonder how many people have actually thought about it and how many have a real-life friend who they would trust with something they have nothing to do with.

    MATT-MAN: I also write as I talk which is why the ellipsis came to The Couch.

    DRILLERAA: Through it will exist for a long time...left ton the last post

    LEELEE: Thank you for the kind words. It is strange that I am so drawn to this man's writing - I will continue to read...

  10. Dana Says:
  11. I have thought about a contingency plan, but never acted on it. In a way - because of the nature of my blog - I'd almost like it to just float along out there for someone to stumble upon.

  12. bond i think matt man should let sarge help him. bwahahahahahah...

    smiles, bee

  13. ...death may very well have no mercy, but that tune is mercifully magnificent!...

  14. Thank you for posting this~ it's thoughtful and touching, and a kind gesture on your part to pay tribute to someone you didn't know, but I dare say you've grasped who he was.

    I need to give my best friend the password to my blog, and yeah, I need to get my Will in order too. None of us are promised tomorrow.

  15. Nice tribute. The Manny coin is a riot!

  16. Jay Says:
  17. I've actually considered writing a Goodbye Post. I don't know if that would be creepy or not. But, my log in and password are written down for either my mother or sister to get on my blog and post for me.

    And I have their log in info too, just in case.

  18. Bond Says:
  19. DANA: I don't think anyone wants the blog to disappear...but the chance for a close friend / loved one to do a final post...or like my answer to jay below

    BEE: and Matt can do Sarge's last post?

    PHFRANKIE: I thought of you when I selected that one

    MAYDEN: Thank you so very much. I know you were a regular reader of JL4, so your words mean a lot.

    BUD: Thanks Sir

    JAY: I actually did write one, but then deleted it...I am not sure it would be creepy...I will probably rewrite the final post so it can be put up when/if something occurs

  20. katherine. Says:
  21. my daughter knows how to find the password...and post a last post...

    and delete my email...


  22. yes but don't tell sarge! ha ha ha

    smiles, bee

  23. That is pretty morbid to have prepared a "final post" especially when you think about how gut wrenching and tear inducing that final post would be considering that it would have to be someone else needing to actually publish it.

    Vinny--any chance you'd read aloud your "final post" on next week's show?

  24. Mimi Lenox Says:
  25. I have actually thought about this many many times. I've even considered writing a post about it (and probably should). Somebody should know your password, somebody who doesn't blog and isn't part of your blogworld, would be ideal. What would happen to the peace globe movement??!!
    Until I find the man of my dreams and settle into a relationship, this is something that worries me.
    Thanks for reminding me that I need a plan. We all do.

    This is a lovely post. What a wonderful daughter and father story. Bless them both.

  26. Tug Says:
  27. I don't have any plans for my blog, but I guess I should; or at least twitter or something to get the word out.

    What little I have, my daughter (only child) will get & do with as she wishes, but I *do* have a living will stating that I don't want to be kept alive by machines, all that. When my brother was taken off life support (best decision for him IMO), my parents questioned themselves for YEARS, if not still... I don't want to be kept 'alive' hooked up to machines because they may still feel guilt about that...it's no way to be.

  28. Starrlight Says:
  29. Well what a pep-pay subject, Vinny! I suppose Kidlet would post on mine as she knows all my passwords. Although when I just asked her she did say it would not be her first priority.

    I suggested Video Blogging my funeral :P

  30. micstillhere Says:
  31. Never entered my mind as to what would happen if I, you know, times up! But pretty wierd thinking that my blog would just sit there forever in the bloggersphere...whoa... that's heavy stuff.
    Very interesting post Mr. Bond.

  32. Travis Says:
  33. I actually have thought about a plan for the blog. I haven't come up with said plan yet, but I've thought about it.

    My deepest sympathies to the family of JL4.

  34. TopChamp Says:
  35. I haven't thought about it before but I suspect my brother would be the best candidate - and probably knows or could guess at my password.

    I love this sky thing - I couldn't get on the web last night but will try to play next week as I love sky photos. I love to see snapshots from all over the world. Climbed up Ben A'an this morning, only to reach the top in a rainstorm. Pah. The sky here: grey.

    Tipex is correction fluid to an American I believe.

  36. Mags Says:
  37. Now that's an amazingly cool picture! I never knew lenses could allow you to frame pics like that. Very neat!

    I don't have a plan for my blog either. I do have it backed up on another blogging network just in case something happens to blogger, but other than that...no.

    I know someone who has written and scheduled a post that reads something like, "If you're reading this, I am dead." Kind of a weird idea, but also...kind of interesting. My luck though it would publish by accident or I'd forget to change the date and I'd freak people out.


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